When I mentioned on Instagram stories last week that I was out of ideas about what to write about, there was a lot of requests to share more about foster care! Which I’m so glad to hear so many of you are interested in, because there is SUCH a great need for good foster homes for children of all ages!

This has been our first and only placement thus far, but we have had our kiddos for almost 8 months now, so I definitely think we have learned a thing or two since day one! So here we go!

CAN YOU PICK AN AGE GROUP TO FOSTER?

Yes! When you are filling out the paperwork and answering all the questions, they ask what ages, gender, and race you are willing to provide care for. We are licensed to care for up to three children of any gender or race, 0-4 years old.

WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU DIDN’T EXPECT ABOUT FOSTERING?

Honestly, I didn’t expect it to be such an emotional rollercoaster. We were not prepared for the constant ups and downs of the case, extreme behaviors, and even my feelings about it all. It’s so hard when you feel like things are finally going well, everyone’s comfortable, and you know what to expect, only for the next day/week/month to be the most challenging. It sometimes feels like one step forward and two steps back, but that is foster care.

ARE YOU ABLE TO HAVE A BABYSITTEr?

Yep! As long as they are at least 18 years old, have an approved background check by your agency before watching the kids, and are of course reliable, trustworthy people! Some states may have specific rules and limitations, but for Michigan that is all that is needed. There should also be other foster parents in your area that are able to provide respite care, if you are needing a sitter for a day, weekend or longer!

What about daycare?

I think a lot of people are hesitant to become foster parents because of working full time, part time, or going to school, but daycare is available and can even be a covered expense (depending on your state) for infants, toddlers, and preschool-aged children. Our kiddos really enjoy daycare and spending time playing with other kids around their ages! It’s great for them to have that socialization and of course, we have to go to work, so it helps us out as well!

what is required for the FOSTER CARE INSPECTION?

There is so much that goes into the inspection, but I can try to break it down to a couple of the bigger things so that you can check these off your list before having the official home study.

Foster homes must comply with all state and local zoning, building and fire safety codes. So if you know that something needs fixing, now is the time to do it!
In the state of Michigan, a telephone must be in service in your home at all times when there is an active placement.
Each child in placement must have their own bed or crib in a bedroom with one or more windows that open directly to the outside.
A smoke detector, battery-operated or hard-wired, must be installed on each floor of your home and operable at all times. As well as a carbon monoxide detector.
If you have any pets, they must be up-to-date on their vaccinations and also registered in your county.

ARE YOU HOPING TO FOSTER TO ADOPT? OR JUST FOSTER? are you OPEN TO TEMPORARY PLACEMENTS?

The goal of foster care is always reunification with the biological parents—until or if their rights are terminated by the court. If termination happens and they cannot reunify, that is when adoption comes into the picture and the caseworker/agency will start reaching out to either family members, the foster parents, or other parties that may be interested in signing an intent to adopt.

As of right now, we are foster parents choosing to love and care for the children that come into our home, whether that is long-term or temporary. We are trusting in God’s plan for our future, but adoption is not where we are feeling lead to right now.

IS IT HARD to RAISe THEM AND THEN SEE THEM GET ADOPTED?

We haven’t experienced this yet, but I would say it would probably be very bittersweet! All children absolutely deserve to have permanency and a loving forever family, but the bond you share is also very real, so I think it is completely normal to grieve that and miss them too. Hopefully you would be able to continue to have a relationship with them wherever they are. (As long as their adoptive parents are cool with it.)

I will add, not to scare anyone away from becoming a foster parent because I truly feel like there are so many people that would be so, so wonderful at it, but I don’t want to make it seem like it’s easy as pie. It’s like parenting on steroids. Okay bad example, but you get what I’m saying. It’s trauma work, so much paperwork, a thousand phone calls, appointments on appointments on top of visits and court dates. It’s exhausting, but it is so worth it and SO needed. It’s easy to see these cute kiddos and think they are just like any, but they aren’t. They are so special and have faced a lot of trials that thankfully so many of us will never have to. They truly deserve all of the love in the world and are worth every hard moment, but I never want to paint a picture that it’s all dance parties and silliness, because it is also a lot of tears and tantrums (and not just from the toddlers, haha!).

Answering Your Foster Care Questions